American Idol, 2009 – Episode 18 (3/5/09)

Idol LogoI’m about to write something I never thought I’d write.

I want Tatiana to succeed tonight.

While there are several good singers this year, so far very few of them have shown any signs of personality.

Tatiana does not lack for personality.

Sure, she drives me nuts, but at least she’s interesting.

And she can sing. I don’t ever want anyone on the show who can’t sing. She was the best female singer in her round, and she deserved to be advanced over Alexis Grace or Michael Sarver.

So good luck, Tatiana.

God help me.

Wild card live blog, coming right up. Spoilers below the fold.

Did Ryan just say, “the judges are wrestling back a little control”? It’s wresting, you moron.

Prediction: This isn’t rocket science, but the judges will almost certainly pick two girls because the previous nine picks are boy-heavy.

Jesse Langseth is going to do “Tell Me Something Good” by Rufus (with Chaka Khan, of course). She says she wants to show off her range. I don’t think this is a good way to do that. I think it’s a good way to bomb big time, which is too bad, because I like Jesse.

She looks great, but unfortunately, my volume is on and she stumbles badly out of the gate.

She recovers a little, but she’s still off the mark.

The crowd is cheering but I don’t think the judges will.

Randy is medium-negative. Kara comments on the somewhat-rough singing but likes her attitude and confidence–I’ll grant her that. Paula is a lot more positive. Simon  has some good things to say but also says she was “indulgent”–one of those critiques where no one knows what on earth he is talking about. For once, I’m glad that the girls talk over him.

They need two girls. They may keep her.

Matt Giraud, the dueling piano player, is up next. I am not a fan.

“Who’s Loving You” by Jackson 5. While I don’t think he’s convincing with the blues, tonight he can certainly pass for blue-eyed soul, and there’s nothing wrong with that. An excellent, memorable performance that makes him a real contender. The judges are going to eat this up with a spoon.

Kara loves his “riffing” but says he was a “little over the top.” Yeah, maybe, but  since when is being a little over the top a crime on this show? Simon compares him to Taylor Hicks, and means that as a bad thing. Well, given Taylor’s sales figures, I can see why–he’s damaging the Idol brand. Randy whoops and hollers says the usual positive Randy stuff.

Megan Corkrey: The judges love her and I don’t. She’ll have to screw up badly tonight not to go through, due to the judges’ silly obsession with her and the need for chicks in the top twelve.

“Black Horse and the Cherry Tree” by KT Tunstall. This is a very good pick for her, but once again, I don’t like her voice at all. What on earth am I missing here? There just isn’t anything special about it. I can hear better singers at any one of several bars in Austin any weekend night. Of course, the judges are going to love this.

Simon says she’s not karaoke. Do you have to take a shot for that? Yes, because he’s wrong. The other judges rave, too. I don’t get it! I don’t have anything personally against her, but the judges’ completely unwarranted raving is starting to cause me to resent her.

Oh, no, here comes Von Smith, who is holding a wild card spot more deserved by any number of other singers.

“Sorry Seems to be the Hardest Word” by Elton John. He makes Elton John sound subtle. Just a ridiculous, overwrought, overcooked, over-everything performance that the judges are going to love.

Simon brings the common sense, but he should have brought it before they picked this guy for a wild-card slot. Kara says he was “dark.” Paula insists he’s a great singer. No, he’s not, and he shouldn’t have been in the top 36 in the first place.

(And why is it that the judges keep slamming people for sounding “dark” this year? What’s wrong with sounding dark? Do they think Joy Division sucks? Early Stones?)

Jasmine Murray: She bombed really badly in her top 36 effort. “Reflection” by Christina Aguellara. Gag.

This is much better than her voting-round effort, but it’s far from great. She’s flat here and there and there’s something I just don’t like about her voice. Cute and all, but I’m afraid there just isn’t much here. I think Jesse Langseth’s odds just improved.

Randy is generally positive, although he notes the flat and sharp moments. Kara didn’t know she had a big voice and is way too positive. Paula thinks she did a wonderful job. Simon is fairly positive and Paula is drunk again and molesting Simon like a lonely girl at 2:00 AM.

They were a bit too kind, methinks.

Ricky Braddy: He was robbed last time and should have gone to the top twelve ahead of either Danny Gokey or Michael Sarver, if we’re basing this on things like, ya know, singing. For that reason, I hope he really brings it tonight.

“Superstitious” by Stevie Wonder. I have on occasion heard this song covered well, but Stevie Ray Vaughn is no longer with us.

This isn’t bad at all, but I wonder if it’s going to be enough when they’re probably only picking one guy tonight. If he’s a bit all over the place, he isn’t off by terribly much when he’s going to those places. And the audience loves it.

Kara: “Good job!” Paula: “You nailed it!”

Simon says “karaoke” (shot!) and “lightweight.” He’s a bit disappointed.

Randy says it was “self-indulgent” and tried to do too much.

So it looks like he’s toast unless Anoop really blows.

Tatiana!: “Saving All My Love for You.” She already sang this song! Kiss of death! When you keep singing the same song over and over again, you give the impression that it’s the only song you know–who cares if she’s doing a pretty good job at it?

Why, Tatiana, why? You really blew it, and I’m mystified.

This girl is crazier than Paula.

Wow, you would think that Paula hasn’t worked in live television for seven-plus years now. She has no idea how to mind the clock.

Simon slams Tatiana for singing the same song over again.

I wish all of these people would shut up.

They’re still blabbing on. I can’t believe I’m writing this, but take control, Seacrest.

Seacrest brings the blow-job joke. What a debacle.

Anoop “Noop Dogg” Desai is finally singing. “My Prerogative” by Bobby Brown. Great, but didn’t he do this one before, as well?

Did he just sing “hitting girls is how I live”?

This is tough song to pull off, and I don’t think he’s pulling it off. It’s a mess. Everyone’s hopes for Noop Dogg were too high, I guess. It ends well, though, so the judges may rave about it anyway.

Simon says again that “people like you.” Again.

Randy really likes it and is now OK with people repeating songs.

Kara wants to dance. Paula thinks he’s “whipping out moves that are a little nasty there.” And now she’s OK with repeating songs as well. Love the consistency, judges.

Well, here we go. I hope it’s Tatiana, Anoop, and Ricky, but I bet it’s Megan, Jesse, and Anoop. Or Megan, Tatiana, and Anoop. Hell, I don’t know. I’ll go with the second batch–Megan, Tatiana, and Anoop, because I feel like I’m cheating if I don’t make a prediction.

Jasmine–Through! That’s a shock.

Ricky–Not through.

Megan and Tatiana–Megan is through! Goodbye, Tatiana. I’m going to miss you. And I still don’t like Megan.

Tatiana looks like she’s going to have to be talked off of a ledge later.

Jesse–gone! Too bad. They say that she nearly made it. She should have gone over Megan, but she also should have sang better tonight.

Von–gone!

Matt and Anoop–Matt is through! Somewhat of a shock there, although he was good tonight.

Anoop is through, too! They’re going to a top thirteen! I guess they figure Anoop’s good for ratings, and they’re probably right.

Goodbye, Tatiana! You’ll be happy to know that Megan’s now officially on my enemies list for beating you and Jesse, and I’m thinking of adding Jasmine to the list as well.

Goodnight, everyone. See you next week.

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5 Responses to American Idol, 2009 – Episode 18 (3/5/09)

  1. Carol says:

    How interesting that after the judges gush over Jorge’s accent that she adopts one of her own.

    Thanks God we’re done with that hot mess.

  2. And she likely didn’t sing with an accent before because the judges told Jorge not to before. With minor exceptions, taking advice from these people is a fool’s errand. They contradict themselves all the time, as witnessed by, after slamming Tatiana for singing the same song again, them saying that Anoop was fine to do it because he sang it better this time. Well, so did Tatiana! And she was better than Anoop on both occasions!

    I wouldn’t mind them pushing their pet singers so much if they would just stop with the phony rationalizations for slamming the singers who aren’t their pets and praising the ones who are. Instead, they just make stuff up as they go along while pretending from on high that they’re giving these aspiring young entertainers useful advice.

    And I don’t know about “hot mess.” I think “reasonably attractive mess” is more like it. ;-)

  3. ron vin says:

    .hey., i do believe megan dfnitely has a good voice over that tatiana., tatiana can sing on tune but there is nothing dffrent or fascinating about her voice(for the record, im not a anti-tatiana, i just find that there is nothing special about her to go through)., and megan is even very fun to watch, very unique so do not be very harsh on the girl.. and its drooling not deuling., i agree with you that ricky should go through over matt sarver but dfnitley not over danny., thats all., peace’

  4. I predicted Anoop, Megan, and Matt to go through before the show even started, and I was right. Remember in the previous rounds where the judges said of all three of those contestants, “Well, your performance wasn’t great, but I hope America picks you anyway?” For the record, Matt was the best of the night, but Anoop and Megan were decidedly awful. That final note that Megan hit (or didn’t hit) set my dogs howling. I like her personality and looks, but this is not a beauty pageant, it’s a singing competition, as Simon so frequently reminds us but always disregards. The hypocrisy of the judges knows no bounds.

    Jasmine, while not terrible, did not deserve to make it through, pure and simple.

    And Tatiana, while crazy, actually sang better than Megan, Anoop, and Jasmine. She gave the judges an easy out to get rid of her by singing the same song, even though she sang it ten times better than previously. I hope she and Normund Gentle end up on a sitcom together. Something in the “buddy cop” format would arguably be the most entertaining thing ever.

    That’s all, peace.

    • If I would have sat down and thought about it more, I likely would have come to the same conclusion–I was right about two but forgot how much they pumped up Matt Giraud. At least he finally earned it last night.

      I also would have realized that Jasmine had to go through. This year, there’s a lack of black singers, young singers, and female singers. She checks off all three boxes in one cute little package. There were easily two and probably more better black singers, but they were male and not young.

      So Ju’Not Joyner was gone due to demographics more than anything else. So was Matt Breitzke, because Michael Sarver filled the “working class” slot and he got through the week before.

      Interestingly, it’s obvious that this year they wanted a “gay” slot. This is why they pumped up Adam Lambert and gave him the last song. Once he was through, Nick Mitchell/Normund Gentle and Nathaniel Marshall were dead no matter how well they did (not that either of them would ever do all that well). I guess we can conclude from this that the show has a substantial gay following, big enough to warrant some manipulation of results.

      Also interesting is that they didn’t try all that hard to fill a “country” slot this year. My guess is that the “working class” and “country” demographics are essentially the same so Michael Sarver was good enough.

      But never forget, it’s a singing competition!

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